Friday, November 6, 2009 Y 11:31 PM
THOUGHT: We've all got one destiny and its our job to achieve it. Some don't ever find it but the lucky few are the truly happy. Babes, I really am sure about this, about everything. In the beginning I doubted our future for many reasons. The first one obviously being a selfish one in which I didn't want to get hurt. I didn't want to be vulnerable. Even though we weren't in contact for 5 years once we started talking again I already trusted you way too much. I liked you way too fast. I was scared. I wanted to take things slow and keep my expectations low in order to protect myself
Second, I didn't want to hurt you. I could see your intentions were pure and that it was hard for you the first time we broke up. I had no intention of making you go through that again so I made sure you were .. aware of what reality was and what my expectations were. But I guess you saw reality earlier than I did.
Another thing is that I didn't want to be making promises that you or I couldn't keep. I don't like making empty promises and I don't like hurting people's feelings. I didn't want to be leading you on or deluding myself.
Regardless of all this though, I wanted and do want it babes. Everything just feels so right. In the past, it was always me trying to control destiny, to manipulate it to how I wanted it to be. I had convinced myself of things that weren't true and spent all my effort into getting what I wanted. But with you, it has always been different. Especially this time. With us,
everything just falls into place.
I want you to know that you're really not holding me back from anything. There really isn't anything in my life that i want to do, that I can't do without you. I want to do the same for you by supporting you in everything you want to do and learning with you. I believe that because we have our parent's support and everything's so perfect, I think we can make it. As long as we're honest with each other and ourselves and we stay committed. : ) I can't wait babes. I think it's gonna be amazing.
